|shaggy loop bracelets, I keep thinking in my head shaggy dog!|
Well, 2013 is almost over, and 2014 will begin. New year always make you think of resolutions, of new beginnings, the ways to make yourself over into a better person. Which sort of naturally leads to thinking something is wrong with you now.
I'm tired of that.
I've struggled for years with just feeling like don't I deserve the space I take up, the air I breathe. All the bad things that happen seem to be deserved, all the good things not. The fear I feel sometimes, waiting for the other shoe to drop -- because life is going well, you know that shoe is out there, just waiting -- it's overwhelming. Sometimes.
The last few years I think, have been better. I look around and despite my own internal self doubts, I seem to view myself with slightly kinder eyes. It's a trend I want to continue.
So my resolution is this: I'm going to pamper myself more. I am a good person, and I deserve the good things I get.
So if I buy a book on i-tunes as a pick me up, it's OK. If I can find a fancy bath product that doesn't make me sneeze or wheeze, then I'm going to buy it, and take that extra time to exfoliate.
It's OK that I like colored pens. If i see something at an art show this summer and can't trade for it, then just maybe I'll buy it outright.
If I can swing an extra girls weekend, I will.
And I'm not going to feel guilty about it, because there is nothing to feel guilt over treating myself well.
Happy New Year's everyone. It's a good year to be kinder to yourself, and to others.